Trapped by Success

Welcome to The Shift, a weekly newsletter where I provide thought-provoking ideas to help you think differently about your career and money.

Last Week + This Week = It’s All Connected

I’ll make this quick.

Last week we talked about how we subconsciously rely on our employers for career advancement more heavily than we should. Read here if you missed it. In part we do that because it has become the status quo. This week I’ll explain what the status quo may have to do with success.

Defining Success

Have you ever written down what you believe makes a person successful? Try it. Write it down. Write the first thing that comes to mind.

Who’s in the Driver’s Seat?

If you are wondering what your neighbor’s answer is…

92% of Americans [believe others] define success by monetary achievements, career status, or fame.¹

Isn’t it funny that almost all of us reach a similar definition of success?

It’s the status quo. It is easy to accept. It might even feel harmless.

At the same time, accepting this status quo essentially means we let others establish what success should be for us.

That means others are dictating our destination.

Money, Power, Respect

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying money, status and fame shouldn’t be part of the pursuit for success. Despite what society says.

I’ll admit the status quo on success is shifting. We are expected to include community engagement, family, health, the environment, etc., etc. in our definition of success these days. Heck, the stat at the start of this newsletter says money, power and fame are “other peoples’” definition of success after all!

Even if we believe the broad definition of success is other peoples’ expectation, external validation is very important to our own definition of success.

Just open your calendar, look at your bank account, or social media accounts. You’ll find your true priorities. Priorities are your path to your future success. More than likely, this probably reflects the broad definition of success in some way.

It’s OK to want money, power, respect. To a comfortable degree.

Trapped by Success

The problem with the status quo is that it becomes a subconscious destination. If your pursuit of success is subconscious, your actions can become untethered to your true goals. You end up pursuing someone else’s definition of success.

Which is when you overshoot. By the time most of us realize this, we are already unhappy or jaded. We’ve made too many sacrifices.

I call this the status quo success trap. It happens in one of two ways. Either the level of success or the path to success you are pursuing is misaligned with your true definition of success.

Do you need the high six figure salary, the million social media followers, or the board seat to get what you truly desire? Asking yourself why you define success the way you do is a good way to determine if your success is truly yours or the status quo.

Maybe a low six figure salary, 10k followers and a non-profit board seat will allow you to reach your goals in a way that doesn’t force you to sacrifice as much happiness? Maybe there is a better way to reach your goals with different people, places and company? Sometimes an adjustment to your path to success is worth considering.

The Bottom Line

If we ensure the pursuit of success is based on our own terms, the journey to success becomes much more rewarding.

Even so, I admit, success rarely comes easy.

Let’s make The Shift!

Lindsey

1. Gallup.